Wake up. Drive to work. Do your job. Go home. Go to bed. Start over again. This is a never-ending cycle that we all find ourselves in. You hate it. You feel trapped. “I hate coming to this building. I hate doing this work. I hate my boss. I hate my job. I hate it. I hate it. I hate it.” These thoughts circle your mind like a hate-filled swarm of bees. Is your job the issue? What do you do now? How do you get out of the emotional/mental trap you’re in? There are a lot of ways to break free and change the way you feel. We are going to cover the steps you need to follow and the changes you need to make to get out of the unhealthy cycle.
1) Identify Where Your Feelings Are Coming From
The first thing you need to do is identify where the negative feelings are coming from inside yourself. Do you hate your job? Is it something your boss has said? Are you stuck in a position with no career-advancing opportunities? Are there issues outside of your job? How are your relationships?
Nothing can be done to change how you feel until you start asking yourself these types of questions. Where is it coming from? Once you have identified that you can start to move forward and get out of the situation of hate, negativity, and emptiness. So, what’s next?
2) Identify How the Feelings are Affecting You
Now that you have figured out where the feelings are coming from, you need to decide how much of an impact those feelings are having on you. Are they influencing your job? Has your boss noticed? Could they be detrimental to your career over the long run?
The reason you want to figure out how the feelings are affecting your day to day is because you want to make sure they aren’t setting you up for failure. The more failure you have, the more it could have an impact on your job, your relationships with your boss and others, and your career overall. The last thing you want is for your boss or coworkers to see any impression that you hate your job.
3) Decide What Changes Need to be Made
Now that you have figured out where the hate and negative feelings are coming from, and you have figured out the impact they are having on you, it’s time to put together a game plan. That plan is going to vary depending on the goals you’re setting for your job and for yourself.
Is it time to make a career change? Is this something you can talk through with your boss? Is there a coworker you can confide in? Do you need to start searching for a new job? Do you like what you’re doing in your job and just need a change of scenery? How quickly can you make the changes? How much longer can you last in this cycle? Who else could these changes impact?
4) Implement Those Changes
Now that you have identified the feeling, figured out where they’re coming from, and decided what changes you need, it’s time to make those changes. It’s time to create a plan and follow it. There are some things to be aware of when you reach this point in the process. Change is hard. Whether it’s a job and career change, a diet change, or a change to when you wake up in the morning. You are more than likely going to go through stretches where it doesn’t feel worth it. You’ll feel like you aren’t going to make it. You’ll ask yourself what you signed up for and reason that there is no way it will be worth it. It’s human nature to struggle when challenging obstacles are placed in our path.
When you are having to make major decisions about your life, like leaving your job, there is going to be an emotional toll, a physical toll, and a mental toll. Your body is going to feel it. As you’re going through things like a job search time will feel like it’s stopped. You will feel exhausted. You’ll gain more resentment and hate toward your boss or whatever it was that pushed you down this path. That’s where you have got to keep pushing through.
5) Keep Fighting
“There are two ways to be happy: change the situation, or change your mindset towards it.” Change is not an easy thing to accept. If you are to the point where you need to start searching for a job, you are going to hit hurdles. You may not find anything you’re interested in. You may hate your current industry and want to try something new. You may feel anxious about the idea of starting a job search and changing your career path. Those feelings will come. The thoughts will creep into your mind. At that point, the easy thing to do would be to sit back at your desk at the job you hate and pretend you can make it work. At least you’re comfortable there. Those thoughts are part of the changing process. There will be an internal struggle with yourself. You’re going to have a mental tug-of-war with what’s easy and what you need to do.
You will have to keep pushing through. Hurdles are made to be jumped over. You have to keep telling yourself that you can do it. You may need to develop a relationship with someone you can talk to about it. Find someone who can be a support for you. If you are making a major change like switching career paths, you are more than likely going to be influencing other people. Go to those people. Take with them about what worries you. But make sure you also talk about the good that can come from it. You want to make sure that you continue to focus on the good. Always keep the good in your view and put the negativity and hate behind you.
“I hate my job.” That’s a thought that everyone has had. There are probably thousands of people that have had thoughts like that this week. How do you get back to loving your job? How do you get thoughts like “I love my job” and “I love what I do” to come back to your mind? You need to look internally at yourself. Is it something you’re doing? After you’ve taken a look at yourself, you’re going to have to see your surroundings. Is there something in your environment or circumstances that have changed that are causing these feelings? Once you can identify where the negativity is permeating from, you can put together a strategy to get past the feelings. That blueprint you put together to break free of the negative cycle will be your key. You want to stick to it.
You don’t need to start doing a job search tonight. You may not need a career change. This plan could be as easy as speaking with your boss about the situation. You could set up bi-weekly meetings to discuss how things are going. You may be able to give valuable insight for them that they would have never gotten without having that conversation. Following that interaction may cause a ripple effect that has a positive impact throughout your department. It may be that you are in a small rut and as soon as you realize it, you can start getting yourself out of it. If you focus on the positive things happening around, that may be enough to change your outlook over time. Remember: Identify where the negativity is coming from, make the necessary changes, and focus on the good. If you find the positivity.